Oh, what a glorious time to be a Packer fan! We are in 1st place in the division and control our destiny for a 1st round bye. We’ve got a home game against da Bears on Thanksgiving night – on national TV, with Bart Starr, Aaron Rodgers and Brett Favre in the house. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Prxh7fS_8MI Congrats to Brett on the retirement of his number 4 … rare recognition as it should be, but well deserved (even though he REALLY pissed me off when he came out of retirement to allegedly play for the Jets en route to playing for the loathsome Vikings … and allegedly emailed a photo of his privates to Jenn Sterger along that route. But, it’s true, time heals all wounds … Coach needs to lighten up and realize that you can take the boy out of Mississippi, but you can’t take Mississippi out of the boy). Create a seam here - X's & O's about the game or a scheme The Vikings game – What a win. What a confidence builder. Special Teams continue to improve and Jeff Janis’ 70 yard kickoff return makes Coach think we are due for a return TD very soon. The punting and coverage teams were good and Crosby obviously shook off the horrendous kick at the end of the Detroit game going 5 for 5 on FG’s and 1 for 1 on extra points. Defense --- when the Packers crowd the line of scrimmage pre-snap, when the Packers play aggressively good things happen. Adrian Peterson was held to 3 yards total on his 7 first down carries. Putting Bridgewater into 2nd and 3rd and long went a long way toward winning the game. Offense --- When Eddie Lacy plays well, the Packers offense is good… The highlights from Sunday include Eddie Lacy had his first 100+ yard game of the year, and when JC Tretter came in for an injured Corey Linsley, the offensive line never missed a beat. The lowlights include watching Bakhtiari getting beaten like a drum and AR clearly struggling. There were several drops, but A-Rod missed wide-open players and both over threw and under threw a wide open Jeff Janis on his two targets. Coach thinks that AR’s shoulder is a bigger problem than they are letting on and that he is not completely over the yips… ….but a steady dose of pounding the rock will fix that. WTF - The Coach's take on a bad ref call or a bad play call or the like OK, so the link at the top of this week's column was the famous "That 70's Show" clip about what it's like growing up in Wisconsin 40 years ago as a Packer fan with hot chicks hanging out in your basement and a stoner that your parents welcomed into your home and he's banging your older sister. That's pretty straightforward. But what’s the deal with Happy Days? Remember Richie and Joanie Cunningham’s older brother in the 1st season, Chuck? What ever happened to him? They like wrote him off the script or something with no explanation. Did he move away or die? Sometimes I can’t sleep at night wondering, WTF? I finally broke down and did a little investigating. It turns out that “Chuck” (Gavan O'Herlihy) left for college (and never returned?) and later in real life moved to England and is famously known there as the actor playing Captain Leroy (as in Butler) in "Sharpe's Eagle" (as in Sterling) during which he said his most famous line that's remembered by fans: "Boys, let's load up and do some shootin" (as in Wisconsin deer hunting). No wonder I was so interested in what happened to him. Well, now I know. Should sleep through the night. BTW, Happy Days was set in Milwaukee 60 years ago and the characters were all Packers fans. Aaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy - that's pretty cool. There are no cool shows about Bears fans. Just sayin. And now for something completely different, the Badgers got bent over by the replay booth judge Saturday on their home field. Do four steps followed by a knee to the ground in the end zone with full control of the ball before falling out of bounds not constitute completion of the process? The rule is designed to apply to quick hitting TD pass plays where the receiver is trying to get one foot (college) or two feet (pro) down before falling out of bounds. There is some ambiguity in the rule that leaves room for common sense. For example, if a Northwestern WR catches the ball on the left side of the end zone, runs 30 steps across the end zone holding the ball up to the student section as if to say ‘FU,’ is struck by a snowball on the 31st step, and is shoved by a Badgers DB on the 32nd step, falls to his knee then out of bounds on the right side of the end zone while bobbling the ball as he goes out of bounds, is the TD disallowed by application of the rule? By any stretch of common sense, 4 steps or 32 steps is a TD, regardless of what happens after that or what Matt Millen says. Enter head coach Paul Chryst, who sided with the officials and expressed understanding of the difficulty in interpreting the rule in his Monday press conference (WTF?). Forget moving on to the next game at MN. This season is toast. After handing over the Iowa game twice in the red zone late, losing this game lays to waste anything accomplished this season despite the lack of offensive talent. Winning at MN doesn’t prove anything other than you beat all the bad teams on your schedule, but couldn’t beat two ranked opponents on your home field. Only Joel Stave’s mother will appreciate anything that was accomplished this season. If I’m a player and I see those Monday comments by the coach, I’m beginning to question Mr. Milktoast and whether he has a pair. The Bears Still Suck - the Coach has proof Yep, there's more... Much ado is being made on local media outlets about the upcoming Packers v. Bears game this Thanksgiving night. Let’s get real, Ladies – the Bears don’t stand a chance … they will face an emotionally-charged juggernaut with Favre in the house for the ceremony to retire his jersey (remember what happened when the Packers played at the Broncos on Pat Bowlen night, even though Pat can’t?). Shoot, Favre could probably slip on that dark green shirt with white #4 one last time and throw for 4 touchdowns against this year’s version of the Midgets of the Midway. Thursday night, during halftime at Lambeau, I will take solace recalling the only other number retirement ceremony that I’ve ever watched… It was on another holiday (Halloween), at halftime of a Packers @ Bears game, coincidentally enough. On October 31, 1994, the Chicago weather was so bad that day it was like God him/herself intended to ruin it for the Bears. Poor Dick Butkus (phonetically, that’s hilarious) and Gayle Sayers. NFL greats that – against their will, were acquired by the Bears. It was a Monday Night Football game, and it was a very cold 42 degrees, very windy, and it rained sideways from start to finish. A rain poncho or any other rain gear was of little help. What made the game bearable (no pun intended) for Packers fans (including God) was that the Packers had their way with the suck-filled Bears that night, beating them 33-6. Favre was his usual awesome self, and it was neat to see both teams in throw-back uni’s. Retiring #4 at halftime on Thanksgiving night and also beating the Bears will be another sweet way to let Bears fans know that we have the superior football team (and city), their team truly sucks, they are our bitch, and there’s nothing they can do about it. Amen. Oh, and another timely topic that proves the Bears still suck… With our victory over the Vikings we have confirmation that Mike Ditka’s Packers sweater curse was lifted (he whored himself out for a few McBucks), along with his pants! http://www.break.com/video/ugc/mike-ditka-does-interview-in-his-underwear-1621716 (you gotta watch this until the “end”) Udder stuff - commentary from the Badger Underground Saturday, the Badgers left a hot steaming turd on the 50 yard line. The decimated OL never looked worse than it did this week. Corey Clement was the leading rusher with 20 yards. Stave ran for his life and was sacked for -58 yards. Overall, the Badgers showed little heart and did not inspire much pride from the Badger faithful. The snowballs were not called for but they did reflect what everyone was thinking. The D kept us in it, but the NW offense was not expected to be much trouble. With a smelly -5 turnover ratio and an overwhelmingly rank -26 yards rushing, the Badgers deserved to be blown out. But, the equally aromatic Northwestern team let Bucky hang around. If not for the stench of absolutely pathetic officiating, the Badgers would have actually won. We can now think about which "Who Cares?" Bowl we will be invited to. Personally, I hope for another Central Florida trip; Badgers fans travel well down there and really help the local bar trade. Maybe the lowly Buffalo Wild Wings Bowl is in our future, hopefully against Arkansas. Is there a Poo-Pourri Toilet Bowl? There should be. Bucky would be great for that bowl this year. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qFI_-kJ95vc Hey wait! We have one more game against Minnie for Paul Bunyan's Axe! The Badgers head up to the site of Sunday's Packer romp; Bucky will be “pushing for a road win” and hopefully won’t stink up the place. This one could go either way although we darn well better win. Let's see if Mr. Inspirational (Coach Chryst) can get the team ready. He has the excitability and insightfulness of a toll booth operator who huffed a bowl full before punching in. This could be the Goofs best chance for a rare win in years. We're gonna kick your a$$ - predictions for the next game The Staleys game – What can Coach say? The Bears suck, but their re-tread Coach is for real. The Bears are actually playing pretty well under new coach John Fox. They are not a very talented team, but they are playing disciplined in all 3 phases. For us, in the words of the late, great Al Davis: “Just win baby”.
Classy. Thursday, November 26th, 2015 will mark the 192nd meeting of the Green Bay Packers and the Decatur, Illinois Staleys (who are now the Chicago Bears). Factually, after playing each other for 94 years, the Staleys lead the series by 1 game, 92-93-6. The cumulative score is 3,277 to 3,266. These two teams have played each other more times than any other pair of teams in the league and the scoring difference is only a mere 11 points … Amazing! Therefore, Coach really wants to win by 12 or more points to tie the series and go ahead on total points…but, win or lose, there is on one fact that drives Bears fans crazy. They suck, and they know that they suck … the Bears are second to the Packers in the only statistic that really means anything, the number of Championships won -- and there's been clear separation in that regard especially across the last 50 years. JB - Packer players you forgot about, but stories you'll remember about them
This week we celebrate one of the all-time great Packer quarterbacks. A guy that brought the chance of consistently winning back to Green Bay after the lengthy demise following the Glory Years. Of course I am talking about Don Majkowski. The “Majik Man” revived the Packers’ possibilities of winning games in the late 80’s. He paired up frequently with Sterling Sharpe for touchdowns – often winning games late, which earned the Packers the media’s nickname “Cardiac Pack” because of their exciting finishes. He played well, somewhat consistently, until he got hurt and subsequently lost his job in 1992 to a young talent from Southern Mississippi who did ok for the next couple of decades. Probably the most famous play of Majkowski’s career is “the re-play” highlighted at the 5-minute mark of this awesome 7-minute piece that describes the history of the Packers / Bears rivalry. After further review, the Bears still suck. Check it out – it’s really worth it… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GKXKXWaexNE I saw the Don lead a 29-16 Packers upset of the Raiders in 1990 at the Los Angeles Mausoleum. He had complete confidence throughout the game and the Packers dominated the favored Raiders on that 87-degree mid-November Sunday. During the game I thought the Raiders fans were going to kill us, so I cheered cautiously (turns out Raiders fans actually maimed a Steelers fan to near death the following week). Before the game we were told by LA’s finest that we couldn’t drink beer in the parking lot. Talk about a WTF! The cops were shocked that we had the gall to even try it – apparently they’d never come across anyone drinking beer in the parking lot before (I suppose they were used to bums drinking Ripple under freeway bridges?), but they were enamored by the cuteness of Wisconsin fans partying before noon in anticipation of the game. They were actually pretty cool about letting us carry out our pre-game ritual, and told us we could keep drinking if we poured our cans of Kingsbury into our red Solo cups so that no one could see it was beer that we were drinking (who would suspect such a thing in LA?). Four months later those cops beat the crap out of Rodney King. But I digress… Don Majkowski’s magic extended beyond the field. I saw photos of him in his city-boy mullet at parties with booze and chicks galore. …Stuff that would make Johnny Manziel blush. He made being a Packer player fun again. Don was the right guy, in the right place, at the right time for Green Bay. …enough to entice Ron Wolf to leave the Raiders and take the reins in Green Bay to start building something special. So, Majik Man, we salute you and what you kick started for us in the late 1980’s – the expectation of winning any game again, and a full house of hot chicks on ladies night at the College Avenue bars in Appleton. Thanks, Play-ya!
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Welcome back to the Coach Clarahanson show! This is a big weekend - 1st place in the NFC North is up for grabs, and it's opening weekend of gun season for deer hunting in Wisconsin! If your son is old enough, take him hunting and teach him about family traditions, camaraderie, and respecting nature. If he's still just a little guy, you can always hit him with a switch like Adrian Peterson. Create a seam here - X's & O's about the game or a scheme The Lions game has been dissected ad nauseam in every media outlet imaginable. And all of it boils down to a few simple observations:
(Well, we were “Top 15” until we gave up a 104 yd 2nd half kickoff return that ultimately was the deciding score after Crosby shanked a potential game winner at the end) We have a defense that plays well once-in-a-while, isn’t that enough? NO No kids, for the Packers above average ST and average Defense are not enough. The Packers are a team that orbits around Aaron Rodgers. Coach can summarize by borrowing an old Russian proverb: “Good Czar, Good Times; Bad Czar, Bad Times” “Rodgers Good, Packers Good; Rodgers Bad, Packers Bad” Ultimately we lost the Lions game because Aaron has the yips. Badger fans understand this problem, having lived through it last year with Joel Stave. MM put out a political leak that Rodgers has a “minor right shoulder injury, nothing to be concerned about” but that’s just window dressing for calling your quarterback a pussy. Doubt that he has the yips? Then explain the ball that bounced off the turf to Kuhn on a 5 yard dump-off, regularly moving past wide-open receivers in his progression and 9 straight possessions that ended in punts after the opening drive, while going 35 of 61 (tying Brett’s record number of attempts in the Monday Night Football Overtime Thriller against SF in Oct 1996). McCarthy got close to calling out AR, but ultimately limited himself to saying “That's something that we have to get corrected because if we have something that continues to happen over and over again, obviously it's my position, I need to make a change. But I think emphasizing the things that we can do better is my focus, and that's what we're going to work on as we hit the practice week." Huh, WTF did that mean? Tolzien time? Coach highly doubts MM will do it, but Mr. P. Manning was shown the bench in Denver. Just Saying. WTF - The Coach's take on a bad ref call or a bad play call or the like This week’s WTF is that we lost to the Lions at home. It’s not like they are good this year. It’s not like we’ve lacked home field advantage. It’s not like the defense can’t stop Matthew Stafford. Sure the special teams gave up 1 long return, but they also did recover an odd-side kick and the Lions kicker missed 2 extra points. So, WTF? I’ll tell you WTF … It is clearly the demise of the recently best QB in the NFL, Aaron Rodgers. I noticed Aaron was “off” a little in the preseason, but just wrote it off to it being the preseason. Then he had that great game against the NFC Champ (but little-known at the time, fledgling) Seattle Seahawks team and the elite media pundits were calling him the Michael Jordon of the NFL. But now we know that isn’t true. What the hell is wrong with Aaron Rodgers? Put an 8 on him and he’s the 2nd coming of Anthony Dilweg. He can’t hit wide open guys; either over throwing them on go routes or underthrowing them on routes underneath. Shoot, he even muffed a shuttle pass to Starks on Sunday! He’s running from phantom rushers. He’s not beating the blitz like he used to. WTF? Well sports fans, Coach knows what’s going on here. I was hoping I was wrong, but I can’t turn a blind eye to what’s really happening any longer – and neither can the rest of Packer nation. Aaron’s lost his mojo, and Olivia Munn has to go (she can stay at my house). Aaron’s clearly got baby batter on the brain, blocking the flow of blood north of his neck, and he can’t focus on what’s really important for the Packers and their fans – winning any big game. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9p3j294sqM8 Think about when the greatest of the greats were at the top of their game: Tiger Woods, Brett Favre, Kobe Bryant, etc.. What kept them consistently great was all the trim that they got on the side while riding high in their sports, too. There’s a reason it’s called being high and dry. It releases the stress that can build up from having a serious relationship. Defense wins championships and blue balls prevent them. What brought these pillars of their profession down was when they got called out. But being in a monogamous relationship is the worst possible stress scenario for a world class athlete. It distracts them with jealous thoughts like, “Why is she smiling at Jeff Janis?” One guy that never slowed down on or off the court was Wilt "the Stilt" Chamberlain. This all-time NBA great claims to have had sex with over 20,000 women. Think about it … you haven’t pee’d that much! That is why he, and all the other great ones, had consistent success at the highest level. We need to get Aaron to tap as many kegs as he can as soon as possible before we find ourselves looking up at a longshot to get a wildcard birth. It shouldn’t be that hard. It’s not like he looks like Mark Rypien or Jim Plunkett. Olivia, you’re hot – you might even be a nice person, but I’m sorry … you’ve got to go. We need Aaron’s mojo back. The Bears Still Suck - the Coach has proof “You Packer fans think the Packers are soooo great, but the Bears won on Sunday and the Packer lost to the Lions. Ha Ha!” We lost because of the Bears you dork FIB’s. Evil genius. Mike Ditka is an evil genius. Anything associated with the Bears equates to losing. So what does evil genius Mike Ditka do (when he’s not pushing his flatulence in Chris Carter’s face on ESPN’s Sunday NFL Countdown)? He puts on a Packer sweater. Genius. Ever since that fateful McDonalds commercial came out almost 4 weeks ago, the Packers have not won a game. Coincidence? I think not. No way the Lions -- the worst team in the league -- are gonna win in Green Bay after losing 24 straight when visiting the Pack ... unless(?) ... down is up, or left is right, or candy is inexpensive at movie theaters, or France declares war, or Mike Ditka roots for the Packers. So, my theory is that his wearing of the sweater has a painful, but likely limited, effect on the Packers. They lose all games until they meet the Bears in Lambeau, beat the Bears and retire Favre’s number, and the curse is lifted. Let’s just hope Jerry Rice’s curse on the Cowboys lasts for several more years. Udder stuff - commentary from the Badger Underground So "Quaecumque Sunt Vera” yous guys! Finally, Bucky has a worthy opponent this week in Northwestern. Both teams are kind of good. Notable wins for the Mildcats this year are, Stanford in a surprise opening day win and….ohh, I guess that’s it. The rest of the wins have been expected. The Purple Haze has lost to Michigan in a game they woulda, shoulda, coulda won. They were basically spanked by Iowa at home. The Badgers woulda, shoulda, coulda beat Iowa at home had Stave not been stepped on by a big fat lineman or maybe if stone hands Wheelwright at not dropped so many passes. We have no signature wins like NW does with Stanford, unless you call the squeaker against paltry Nebraska a big win. The teams are ranked 20 and 21 which helps confirm they are kind of good, if you believe the rankings, which we do not. So, by this intense in-depth analysis, this is shaping up to be a doozy of a game. The game coulda been for all the marbles in the west division, but it is not. Even so, look for a very evenly matched game. The way things are shaping up, this game is really for pride only. Chances are Iowa and tOSU will go to BCS bowl games. Over rated Michigan will go to one Florida Bowl game and Michigan State will go to the other. That leaves slim pickins for any other kind of good team. Of course MSU could beat Ohio State and Michigan will almost certainly lose to the Brown Nuts. That could open the door for another trip to sunny Central Florida for the winner of Saturday’ game. We kind of doubt that will happen. The Badger-Wildcat outing is always fun and the purple love coming to Madison. We have tailgating and bars. One forgettable moment is chronicled in this vintage YouTube video from the infamous 1996, “take a friggin’ knee” game. Barry, usually pretty level headed, showed the decision making skills of Brent Bile-Enema that day. Lee Corso beat up Barry over that decision at every opportunity for a couple of years, which had to have negatively impacted Wisconsin recruiting and unofficially led to a karma induced stroke for Lee. On the positive, we did something very comparable to the Mildcats at Evanston the following year. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=du0-FdQZ57w The home team has won this game for the last several years. WI always had the better team, losing tough games there and blowing them out at Madison. Corey Clement is questionable, which could be a real bummer. Both teams have good defenses, padding their stats against bad offenses. With Clement, we win this game comfortably. Without him, I still think we win a grinder. Traylor is also questionable. His return would have a significant positive impact, giving us two good pass catching TE’s. Hoping Chryst doesn’t wait until halftime to make adjustments if Stave is taking hits like Rhonda Rousey or Aaron Rodgers. Notice how Paul Chryst can call a better offensive game than the Packers with no deep threats, a much lesser OL, and a much lesser QB? Juuuuust sayin. We're gonna kick your a$$ - predictions for the next game If you’re a smart deer hunter, you won’t come out of your tree stand before it's dark on Sunday afternoon. You’ll wait until all the impatient posers get up from their stands to go watch the 3:25pm kick-off / touchback and the subsequent 14 erectile-dysfunction commercials before a real play is even run, thereby allowing those donners of the blaze orange to kick da turdy pointer right to ya. You’ll have an earbud in your left ear so you can listen to Wayne and Larry talk about the quaint setting of the U of M football stadium that the Queens in until the new dome is built, and how cold it is to play outside in Minnesota, and that the stadium runs east-west instead of north-south and crap like that, and wishing you HAD put those toe warmers in your boots. So, all that being said, what do we need to do to lay the hurt on the purple child beaters this Sunday? Coach thinks it comes down to this:
JB - Packer players you forgot about, but stories you'll remember about them I'm not gonna say how old I am, but mathematically-gifted Packer fans might be able to figure this one out... So I'm in my "x"-and-older flag football league (a.k.a. "Let's go suck beer every Tuesday night this summer, and since it's a city-endorsed, local-tavern-sponsored intramural sports team, we're seriously committing to each other for real to show up each week, and not only that but our wife's won't bitch too bad because they think we need some exercise anyways" league), and we’re actually not too bad so we enter a regional tournament to extend our drinking rights onto a weekend in a city far away from our families (which gives us carte blanche to crap and/or throw up violently in a bathroom that we don't have to clean up later, even if it looks like a homicide occurred)... …And there's this one team that shows up with a Ringer. I mean this guy is throwing footballs like he's firing bullets from an A-Bolt; highly accurate and extremely fast. He's got a completely silver top buzz cut, is tall and built like a brick sh!#house -- solid, like a real city fireman or something (not an overweight rural volunteer firefighter that does it for the extra cash, and just so happens to also be a pretty good cook so the guys at the firehouse like having him around once and a while). So I ask the guy "Were you like a Division I QB in college or something?" and he's like, "Played a little pro ball, actually." And I was like "Really? That's so cool! Who'd you play for?" And then he says "The Packers". And I'm thinking to myself ... bullsh!# -- I know every Packer QB from Rich Campbell to BJ Coleman, and I certainly would know a GOOD Packer quarterback when I saw one. So I says "Oh yeah, then I know you ... what's your name?" He shook his head and walked away. So I looked at the game roster for both teams. Mutherf*<<3r! TJ Freaking Rubley. An Iowa first team all-stater, proud product of Davenport West HS and the University of Tulsa, Theron Joseph (TJ) Rubley was the 228th pick of the 1992 Draft, selected in the 9th round by the LA Rams. After spending the ’92 season on the bench, TJ started 7 games for the Rams during the ’93 season. By 1995 he was the Packers 3rd Stringer behind Brett Favre and Ty Detmer.
Rubley earned his place in Packer lore almost 20 years ago to the day, November 5th, 1995 inside one of the worst stadiums in the history of the League, the Humpty Dump (respect to Digital Underground, who Coach loves https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y38Ec57yMG8). The 5-3 Packers were on the rise with Brett and Reggie and were favored over the 3-5 Vikings. During a very physical first half Brett went 14 for 20 before severely spraining his his ankle in the second quarter. He subsequently threw 2 third quarter picks and Coach Holmgren had no choice but to retire him for the day. Back up Ty Detmer performed admirably, tying the game at 24 on a two-point conversion to Chewy, but he broke a finger and had to take a seat next to Brett. On trotted Theron Joseph in the 4th Quarter, who promptly fumbled the first snap from center Franky “bag-o’-donuts” Winters. The faithful were nervous about the game slipping away, but LeRoy Butler stripped the ball from Queens RB James Stewart and George Teague Recovered. TJ did pretty well and completed on 4 of 5 to get the Packers down to 3rd & 1 on the Queens 38 yard line, tied 24-24, with about a minute left in the game……and then it happened. The entire football watching world new that the Packers would run on 3rd and 1; well, all knew that except for the Viqueens. The Packers lined-up 4-wide with a RB and Queens responded with 6 in the box and lined up 5 in coverage. Holmgren had called a QB sneak, a perfect play against the Viqueens D, which would either get the 1st down or set up for a manageable 55 yard FG to win the game in the Dump. But, TJ Freaking Rubley decided he would be a hero and audibles to a pass play. The entire team new it was a mistake and Bag-O-Donuts himself even tried (unsuccessfully) to call a timeout before the snap. Rubly threw a weak cross-body-throw, late, down-the-middle in the direction of a heavily covered Antonio Freeman and you guessed it, the ball was intercepted. Warren Moon took over and moved the Queens into FG range and they kicked a game winner with only a couple of ticks left on the clock. Holmgren cut Rubley the next day and he was not even allowed on the team plane for the ride home. Fast forward to the end of the season and we have to play in Dallas (again) for the NFC Championship game. You know the rest. That was Rubley’s last minute of being on an NFL roster, but interestingly TJ Freaking Rubley did find Eurosuccess with the Rhein Fire and the Hamilton Tiger-Cats before his career highlight of playing QB Coach to Keanu Reaves (who can’t throw a football in real life, BTW) in the movie The Replacements (not the Stinson brothers band of the same name -- who, ironically, are from Minneapolis https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pMRUszqMVM8). But who know where TJ is now, and Coach digresses... Of more importance is what the heavily injured Favre did to the Wanstadt coached Bears the following week and Coach will discuss that another time (perhaps, in foreshadowing fashion, before the Bears game?). So, this week instead of our regular loyal and heartfelt “sa-lute” to former Packer great we say, TJ, go FIND yourself. Just in time. We need this bye week. We didn't come out of the last one so well, but playing the woeful Detroit Lions at home is, in effect, a bonus bye week for the Packers because we get an automatic W without having to try. Here's a fun fact: 8 current active Lions players were not even born yet the last time the Lions won in the state of Wisconsin. Amazing as that sounds, it's true. What state do the Lions live in? That, of course, would be the state of Disarray. In fact, the Lions are sooooo bad, they only have 1 win! (But it was against the Bears, so that's not really anything to be proud of. BTW, the Bears are from Loserville. So, the Lions are woeful, and the Bears suck -- which is worse? That's like asking "What's worse, ignorance or apathy?" Of course, the correct response is "I don't know and I don't care." ) Create a seam here - X's & O's about the game or a scheme Ok, the gloves come off. A preseason Super Bowl favorite (along with the Colts), the Packers are stinking it up and Coach can’t take it anymore. There was a rough period for Packers fans between the end of the 60’s dynasty and the start of the current 23-year-and-counting run where we expect playoffs as the indicator of a minimally successful season. The 21 seasons where 8-8 and was a great year, the years where we backed-in (1972) and wallowed through the Players Strike (1982) to make the playoffs are long gone. The heritage and the legacy of the Green Bay Packers is one thing, and one thing only, Championships. The great teams of ’95-’98 won only one Super Bowl. The lax approach to SB XXXII, the TO catch at the Stick in ’98, the 2007 heartbreak on Saturday night at Lambeau, the 2011 disappearance of the Offense when the 9-7 Giants showed up for the Playoffs. Arizona, San Francisco, Seattle, enough? No not enough for Coach. Super Bowls XXI & XLV are fantastic to have in the trophy case……but between jerseys #4 & #12 we do not have enough hardware in the case at Lambeau. Thirteen NFL Championships are more than any other team, but we hunger for another, and we want it now. THE OFFENSE STINKS. Coach has ranted about Legume Capers and his Defensive Scheme for as many years as he’s been in GB (yes, including the enchanted year of 2010, but more on that in future weeks as we approach the playoffs). And against Carolina we had some huge breakdowns. Cam Newton went 15-of-30 passing including long passes of 59-yard completion to Jerricho Cotchery on a 3rd-and-13 in the second quarter and 52 yards to Devin Funchess for 52 yards as part of back-to-back touchdown drives and a 27-7 deficit. The Panthers 427 put the Big Legume’s defensive total at 1,475 total yards over the last three games. As frustrating as that is, as frustrating as it is to watch an anemic pass rush, Clinton-Dix out of position, poor tackling, etc., etc., etc…….it is not “the problem” this year. The Defense is not playing well enough to go far in the playoffs (yet again), no “the problem” is the offense. In the first half against Carolina we had five drives that went nowhere….contemplate this for a moment ye Packer faithful. An Aaron Rodgers led offense had drives of -7, -1, -1, 0, -7 yards in the first half. This type of production has led to an alarming lack of plays for the offense, low Time-Of-Possession, and, importantly, has left the Defense on the field for far too long. The table below shows the number of plays the Packers have had vs. the number of plays our opponents have had in each game. For the Season-To-Date we have averaged 59.9 plays per game (PPG), 7 fewer than our opponents and a sickening 31st in the League. The average number of PPG for our opponents (66.4) means that we have “made” our opponents the equivalent of the 9th ranked Offense. For those of you keeping score at home, the average of the last 3 games is even worse! We have ranked 30th with 55.7 PPG vs. 72.7 / 3rd ranking for our opponents. They have had the ball for an average of 17 more plays a game than we have!! The trend has been poor all year, but wheels seem to start coming off the bus during the Rams game. Coach was at the Rams & San Diego games and neither of those games felt like wins. Why? Well there have been many reasons: poor blocking, substandard play by Lacy, lack of separation by receivers. But he number one issue is poor play by Aaron Rodgers. Clearly he lacks confidence and he is waiting for his receivers to get open before throwing. The NFL is too fast; a QB cannot wait to “see” open receivers. Probably the best way to summarize the season to-date is to listen to #12’s summary of the ending at Carolina: “It was a great call, when I looked out to Peanut (Tillman) to see if he had eyes in the backfield, because I was worried about him shuffling off and him tackling Randall short of the goal line. Turns out (Jones) kind of ran Peanut into (Coleman) and Randall was wide open for the touchdown, so that's disappointing. I had the easy opportunity there for a pitch-and-catch touchdown, but I got scared by something. I can't explain it. It was a mistake by myself. I will definitely be thinking about that one on the ride home, but we have to move on tomorrow and get ready for this divisional stretch." Don’t think he knows he’s playing crappy? Have a look at Aaron Rodgers on the Sideline after the interception at the goal line. https://vine.co/v/elZOMPFAbnl Later he said “I should have been more decisive. I got off it and I should have gone to Davante (Adams). That's why it's so frustrating. I let the indecision slow me down a little bit.” This hesitation is not a new development. Rodgers has been holding the ball longer than usual for a month. His last truly consistent game from start-to-finish was Week 3. His ranking should rise down the stretch, but this has not been one of Rodgers' better years after his scalding hot start. 1. Brady 2. Carson Palmer 3. Cam Newton 4. Andy Dalton 5. Aaron Rodgers 6. Ben Roethlisberger FORMULA FOR THIS WEEK? We have to win to stay on top of the Division, so get your head out of the dark place. Offense & Defense --- Coach would make the team sit and stare at each other in silence for 30 minutes followed by 2 hours of Oklahoma drills for the whole team. But I guess real football is no longer allowed under the CBA, so:
WTF - The Coach's take on a bad ref call or a bad play call or the like Dear Hustler, I know you won't believe me, but this is really true... I actually perfectly predicted the first 6 non-punt plays that the Packers ran on offense to start the game against Carolina. Talk about predictable - sheeez. I'm not REALLY a coach, ya know. Just an average Joe that watches the Packers every Sunday (and occasionally reads Playboy for the interesting articles). I'm not claiming to have prophesied them before the game started, but before each play was ran I said (for example) "They're gonna play action rollout Rodgers to the right and throw to the TE to start the game." And they did (1st play). I then commented out loud to my dog that they would run the same pass to Kuhn to the left side in the subsequent series ... and they did (only they substituted Ripkowski for Kuhn, but exactly the same thing only different). ...actually, that was a very productive play (which they never ran again for some dumbass reason). As they broke the huddle the first several times, I accurately called out the targeted receivers and the general pass routes they would run, and I even suggested the inept faceplants by Eddie Lacy into the backs of JT Lang and Byran Bulagaria. My dog knows it's true, she suffered through it (looking at me like she couldn't figure out how humans got to the top of the pecking order, especially considering that I follow her around the backyard on Saturdays to collect her feces in a bag). Believe me, I'm NOT bragging here about being clairvoyant or an astute dissector of playbooks; I am in serious WTF mode -- scared out of my wits that we are on the breaking point of falling back to the days when my dad would scream at the Curtis Mathis and throw his sponge-like "TV brick" at the channel-changing dial, and my sister would tell him to shut up so she could practice her disco moves on paper footprints that she strategically placed on the living room carpet while listening to her Saturday Night Fever album. I mean, if a guy like me -- without any professional football training or sobriety, mind you -- can figure out what they're pretty much gonna run on every play, then just imagine what actual NFL defensive coordinators will be able to do to stop us. Hate to say it, but alas it is time for big Mike to start calling plays again. ...at least we could get to leading in the 4th quarter of the NFC Championship Game. I'm not sure how deep we can get with the crap that I've seen Tom Clements call in the last 3 or 4 weeks. The Bears Still Suck - the Coach has proof The pathetic Bears go to St. Louis to get silenced by the Lambs. No doubt Jay Gutless has seen the footage of Teddy Bridgewater getting knocked unconscious by the Rams D, so he'll pull a Jim Everett early / often and self-sack or fake a knee injury to avoid getting hit. Bear down! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWhPQvkIBWs Udder stuff - commentary from the Badger Underground BUCKY RANKED! Depending upon which poll you see or believe, the Badgers are somewhere between 22 and 25 in the college football rankings. In other words, the pundits finally got it right. We can beat most teams, but not about 20 of them. Maryland was able to muster enough gusto at home to hang with us until the 4th Q last Saturday, and it helped them that we played pretty crappy. But they aren't very good, and we are good enough to win against bad teams even when we don't play very well. So there you have it. This week Bucky will have one of its toughest opponents in weeks. The practice scrimmages promise to be tougher than the fighting ILL, Rugburns University, or the College of Ferryland. With a bye, there's not much to pontificate on other than to reemphasize the importance of the upcoming home game versus the Northworstern Mildcats or, as I call them, the Chicago Vikings. If we beat them, we will likely be in a good enough position for a respectable January bowl game against another overrated SEC team (see link below) -- which would turn out to be not too shabby considering the injuries and youth we've had to overcome this year with a new coach. And now here's something we hope you'll really enjoy...
https://youtu.be/eQnYfkDO5Ks We're gonna kick your a$$ - predictions for the next game Not sure Coach could say it much better than this... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDRtFGDE6DM Beyond that, though, it is worth mentioning that the current version of the Packers OL is a good, but not elite outfit—not the caliber of the Tauscher, Clifton, Rivera, Wahle unit. Even when they were playing well earlier this year, the Bakhtiari got overpowered. They did a great job when Rodgers had his calf injury last year. Rodgers also made them look better by running out of trouble. When they had Nelson on the field, defenses could not cheat by crowding the line and daring us to beat them deep. Now that defenses are loading the box, the running game has also taken a hit. Lacy needs some space in which to work and get going, before he can run through arms and tacklers. Compounding matters, he now weighs 260 lbs, making it tougher to make cuts and burst. Starks probably isn’t any better than last year and isn’t as good as last year’s 2nd half Lacy. For the moment, until we can figure out a way to spread out defenses again, he gets the start but both backs will get a good share of carries. Back to this OL. Numerous times late last year they could not get 1 yard in goal line situations. Yeah, Sitton was dinged up. Or, you could argue that there should have been more creative play calling. Bottom line is that they are not overpowering. I think they are pretty good, but not elite. Weakest link is LT. Linsley screwed up a couple of plays last week which were crucial, but I think he’s generally pretty good. I give Rodgers credit for admitting that he got scared and choked on the TD pass to Cobb late, but he probably did so only because what everyone saw was pretty obvious. No talking your way out of that one. He has taken a beating in the press this week, with Cowherd comparing him to Cutler in how he relates to teammates (ouch). I wouldn’t go that far, but he is a 2-time MVP QB and many QBs and top WRs are egomaniacs. Comes with the territory. Conversely, Cutler will NEVER be an MVP (but he is OPP). Rodgers & McCarthy often clashed over play calling last year. Rodgers the politician kept that off the radar screen by occasionally giving McCarthy credit for good play calling. However, after McCarthy ran the ball 3 times into the strong side of Seattle’s defense for a quick 3 & out late in last year’s NFC championship game, Rodgers ripped his playcalling in the postgame interview stating "that’s how you lose ball games." Between that, the special teams debacles and Clay Matthews injury confusion on the sideline late in that game, McCarthy I am sure felt forced to give up the playcalling. The idea was probably something along the lines of if you (Rodgers) are the smartest guy in the rooms and don’t like my play calling, see if you can do better. Even though we are missing Nelson, who stretched defenses, opening up short passes, took defenders out of the box and gave us more space to run, we should be getting more production out of the guys we have. Drops seem to be way up this year, killing drives. Receivers don’t seem to be getting open, indicating among other things that the playcalling has become too predictable — as previously mentioned. New England seems to get their slow-footed guys open. Yeah, they have Gronk, but they also run pick and other plays schemed to get certain guys open. Defensively this week, we’ve got everyone back except for Shields. Shields is the best cover guy. We have struggled in the past when he was out, but we still had Tramon Williams on the field. House had games where he got torched, but also had a couple of games where he held down the fort. On this year’s team, Shields is more irreplaceable than ever. Peppers made a comment earlier this week that GB has nothing to prove. Coming from a guy who took chunks of plays off, vacationing his way out of Carolina and Chicago, he hasn’t brung it for weeks. His comment is 100% consistent with the way he has played. Incriminating himself, look for a big game Sunday against Detroit instead of in the last two games where we really needed him to elevate his play. Looking forward to seeing both Montgomery and Adams on the field and relatively healthy for the first time this season. Hoping that translates to some good productivity. We should be approaching the healthiest roster that we’ve had all year. Looking past Detroit, we’ll need it at MN. If we can be healthy going into the playoffs, I like our chances of getting to the SB. All the top NFC teams are flawed. The sooner a larger chunk of the playcalling gets back into McCarthy’s hands, the better. Get your torch and pitchforks. JB - Packer players you forgot about, but stories you'll remember about them Harry Sydney. Yeah, you know him as the velvety smooth-spoken ex-Packer who graces the airwaves at 4pm most weekdays, and pre- and post-game on Green Bay sports talk radio. But the thing about it is, in 1992 when it was 3rd and 2 from the 11 yard line, Harry Sydney caught Brett Favre's 14th career touchdown pass. Why is that significant? Because that touchdown reception on a snowy December day in Milwaukee was Favre's 2nd TD pass of that day (you'll recall the 1st TD pass was the infamous bomb to Sterling Sharpe when Sterling refused to cross the goal line and, instead, merely outstretched his hand with the football in order to have it cross the plane so he could score without going into the end zone - but then fumbled it prior to crossing the goal line and luckily had it bounce back up to him in the end zone). The opponent on that day, the Detroit Lions, scored 10 points against the Packers (recall the Lions were in the NFC Championship Game the year prior, but lost to the SB champs, Washington "insensitive name mascot" team. So, in effect, Harry Sydney's catch and run for that touchdown sealed the victory for Green Bay on that day. ...And the Packers have NEVER lost to the Detroit Lions in Wisconsin since then. Brett Favre never lost to Detroit at home, and neither has Aaron Rodgers. Shoot, even Matt Flynn beat the Cryons at Lambeau in 2011 as a joke. So thank you, Harry Sydney, for starting an annual tradition that many of us Packer fans take for granted each year (like Lambeau leaps, or leaves changing color by the 1st of October, or watching a drunk co-worker make an ass out of herself at the company Christmas party, or seeing Illinoise plates on a car pulled over by a Wisconsin state trooper on a holiday weekend), and that is of course the decades old tradition of beating the woeful Detroit Lions at home. It's all good. Just kidding, I didn't really think we were gonna beat the Broncos by 14+ points. ;-) Watching close up camera shots during pre-game warm ups, I could already tell the game would be lost. Rodgers did not look like himself when going through the motions … he looked burned out (perhaps an afternoon snack at a local Denver hash bar, or maybe overtired from an extra hour of daylights savings sleep?), with concern and doubt across on his face -- not the WWE belt confidence and swagger that we’ve come to know and appreciate. There’s a lot of blame to go around for the loss (see the X’s & O’s section below for the weekly gag on Capers’ failure to put 7+ in the box on every snap), but the brass tacks is A-Rod laid an egg Sunday night. He gets paid to perform better than the other QB’s and lead the guys on his team through tough games like that, but he was not able to. Who did show up for GB? Clay Matthews, that’s who. Like Rodgers, when Clay is out of the lineup, his side of the ball is effectively, well, ineffective. The Claymaker brought it on every play against Denver. He looked like the only guy off of the line of scrimmage who was willing to make a tackle. Alligator arm tacklers peppered the secondary, reminiscent of the Mike Sherman d-backs that bounced off of ball carriers instead of wrapping them up. When Clay was in there prior to rolling his ankle and forced to imitate "the Gimp" from Pulp Fiction, the defense remained competitive and he was leading the others by example – they responded with good play at the end of the 2nd Q and in the 2nd half until he got hurt. When he was out for 4 plays, Denver’s mediocre-at-best offense easily marched down the field in healthy chunks across the middle (running and passing). As Pat Bowlen so eloquently and ironically once stated, it was a forgettable night. The good news? (1) That game really didn’t matter. As Coach pontificated previously, an AFC loss means nothing if we beat Cam-olina this coming weekend - we would then have the tie breaker for home field advantage. (Conversely, if we lose to the Pants'ers, were behind them by 3-games for playoff seeding. Yikes - big game!) www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIcCPgP9mu4 (2) If lack of motivation or over confidence was a factor, a humbling dose of reality was doled out in front of 17 million household viewers between the ages of 18 and 49 (twice as many viewers as those who watched the final game of the World Series, which was the highest-rated World Series in several years). (3) Special Teams played pretty well. More notes on that below. (4) The Bears still suck. (more on that later, too…) Create a seam here - X's & O's about the game or a scheme “Clearly the better team this evening. For us, a very humbling loss. Frankly, Gary Kubiak had his team playing a lot faster than I had my team tonight. I thought that was evident early and often. I don’t feel good about the way we performed. … Very humbling loss.” “You have to run the ball; you have to run against an excellent pass rush as Denver has. We got some things going on offense; we really just couldn’t sustain it.” “You’ve got to compliment Denver. That’s a humbling loss. I haven’t had my ass kicked like that in a long time. They covered us very well. I thought we pass protected particularly well in the first half and there was a lot of green grass out there. So they did a heck of a job covering us.” ----- Mike MacCarthy, Sunday, November 1st 2015. Let’s cover the good right away: Special Teams continue to climb in the Dallas Morning News rankings and we are in the top-half of the league. The Zook-McCarthy team has had the biggest impact on Punt & KO Coverage where we are now top-10 in allowed return yardage. Crosby is almost automatic and Mastay had his best game of the year. Returns are average to below and could use some work, but when Montgomery comes back healthy and Abbrederis is trusted more, look for 2 or 3 return touchdowns in the last half of the season. Special Teams may not be winning games yet, but at least they are not losing them……which is a very big improvement over the last several years. The Defense has been roundly critized, and deservedly so, over the course of last week. Going into the game we were giving up fewer points/game than any other team, which obviously was a key component of going 6-0. Coach believes strongly that if you score more points than the other team it greatly enhances the odd of winning the game, so preventing the other guys from scoring is probably a good idea. Arguably the next most important defensive statistic is the average number of yards gained/play; that is, how many yards to the other guys go with each snap of the ball. Obviously if they get fewer yards/snap they will have fewer first downs and more stalled drives. Thru the first 4 weeks we were giving up 4.9 yards/play for a respectful 7th place in the NFL. The last three weeks we have given up 6.2 yards/play putting us between Tampa Bay and Baltimore at 28th in the League. In Denver we gave up 7.9, just a tenth of a yard better than the NYG and the Skins for 30th. This is also reflected in Time-of-Possession where over the last 3 games where we are dead last in the NFL at 35 minutes for the opposition. The Chargers and Broncos combined for 1,048 yards of offense against the Capers led defense…..interesting to contemplate that, in 7 games, the Broncos have only given up 1,828 yards. While stats make for interesting for bar talk, the more important discussion is “What the hell is going on out there?” One guy thinks he knows... “Our play style wasn’t what it had been, we have to take a good look at that” opined defensive coordinator Dom Capers. When pitted against good running backs we consistently brought 7 and 8 players into the box pre-snap and then dropped into coverage. The last few weeks we’ve lined up 6 or 5 in the box, 2 defensive linemen and the safeties very deep. The play in Denver that epitomizes this is the running TD Denver scored in the 3rd Qtr. On 2nd and 7 from the 28 yard line, GB was line up with the safeties on the goal line, so once C.J. Anderson broke through the first tackler (Joe Thomas) he was free to get into the end zone (see also, WTF). “Running has such a big influence on every aspect of the game, we ended up giving up five big runs. To me the biggest culprit of the game was their ability to get big runs, and that allowed them to get into their play-action game.” Coach Capers observed. We’ve got to come back in here on Wednesday and get back to work. We’ve got to make sure we get back to our play style … against a team with a diverse offense and a quarterback that can do a lot of different things.” That insight from Coach Capers was heartily echoed by Coach McCarthy “It starts with the run, and that was my number one coaching point for the defense. We needed to stop the run…we didn’t accomplish that at all.” That kind of critical thinking and insightful analysis prompts this Coach to blurt out: “No sh#!, Sherlock”. It’s not hard to see we are playing so poorly on D. On Offense we have seen a similar collapse in effectiveness over the last several weeks. While the opposition has averaged 74 plays per game we’ve averaged a mere 51 plays/gm for dead last in the league, when paired with our 20.3 points/game, the offense can be called nothing but anemic. Over the last 3 games we are tied with St Louis for 23rd most prolific scoring offense. What’s wrong? Coach thinks it’s too much P…..
www.youtube.com/watch?v=eH9qnOb9ghc WTF - The Coach's take on a bad ref call or a bad play call or the like Dom, c’mon, man. You just saw this same offense 2 weeks ago in your last game (when you gave up over 500 yards). Rivers out, Manning in, same game plan … short timing routes designed to get rid of the ball before the QB can get sacked (and another 500 yards gained). Have you no answer for this, my toupee wearing genius? Let me answer for you: load the box, but drop 1 or 2 into coverage after the ball is snapped. Duh. Don’t like that answer? Go watch the game tape of Super Bowl 48 to see how the Seahawks befuddled Manning. That’s the blueprint to stop him. And the run defense? I don’t know what the hell you were trying to do dropping 2 safeties into the end zone with Denver on the 28 yard line – which they still ran in for a touchdown. I realize Matthews was out for that play, but you gotta coach better than that. As one of your last remaining apologists left in Green Bay, I am losing my patience. I won’t go Dan Devine on your puppy, but get it together man or I might succumb to peer pressure soon. Make some damn adjustments, man! WTF! WARNING: this is a preemptive WTF to give you the opportunity to not make this topic next week: ...if I see Cam Newton run a QB draw from the 5 yard line and easily trot up the middle into the end zone, I WILL kill your dog! Clemmy, c’mon, man. It’s no secret your receivers can’t get open, but that’s never stopped A-Rod (or Favre, or even Joel Stave) before. Geez, man, just do the same damn thing that the AFC West is doing to Dom… short timing routes. All you need is a top 10 QB (Rodgers certainly qualifies), and a willingness to release the ball quickly on a 3 step drop. I’m gonna give you the benefit of the doubt, Tom, and blame this loss on Rodgers for not throwing the ball – but you only get this one. When bored of short timing routes, run the ball (repeat). Even the hapless Colts were effective running the ball against Kuechly & Co. …not obvious in the 1st half, but the continued pounding paid off in the 2nd half and then they could run at will in the 4th quarter. So, Tom, if we stop running Lacy and force more long-developing pass routes into the game plan, Edgar Bennett will be talking into your laminated play sheet on the sideline the following week. ...and you won't get that Titans head coaching job that you've been eyeing up. Teddybear, c'mon, man. You didn't even attempt to get Vernon Davis? ...the guy that was drafted right before you picked AJ Hawk! Davis went to Denver for a 7th round pick -- AFTER we lost the game to them (largely in part because we have zero threat at TE). That's like losing twice to Denver in 2 days. WTF! I hope Davis has some serious bipolar, locker-room-cancer baggage that I don't know about. (exhale / sigh) The Bears Still Suck - the Coach has proof “Hello. I am the Chicago Bears. I suck. I was ahead of the Minnesota Vikings by 7 points with less than 2 minutes left in the game, and I lost by 3 points. In regulation. At home.” Thank you, Bears, for sucking so bad. I knew you would lose, I overtly predicted it, and you did. Why do I care? Because you kept the loathsome Vikings within 1 game of da Pack. …Coach likes the added pressure, as we are capable of not bringing it each week -- which is incited by the local fans in their broasted chicken and beer belly-stretched Packers sweatshirts, who dote over 2nd string offensive linemen making guest appearances at local supper clubs that host Packer-themed radio shows in northeast Wisconsin. It is way too easy to drink the “you’re great” Kool-Aide in Green Bay. But - with those pesky purple shadows, we can’t just rest on our laurels like Christian Laettner. The trade deadline has come and gone. It’s hilarious to Coach that football pundits annually list Bear players as the most likely trade bait as the deadline approaches. The bridesmaid Bears are always the midseason “sellers” and never the mid-season “buyers” – especially ironic that they spend carelessly during the offseason on crap talent and/or force-fit big names into roles they aren't suited for, and then dump those players the following year for a song when they realize that they have no chance to make it to the post season (a.k.a. the “real” season), and that their investment did not pay off (see Jared Allen). This year’s trade-deadline candidates were Alshon Jeffrey (or is it Jeffrey Alshon?) – potentially to Carolina, and Matt “Will” Forte – potentially to Pittsburgh. Even veteran PK Robbie Gould’s name was being “kicked” around (ha ha) as trade material. You might not know that as a young man, Robbie was a heartthrob teen idol acting the lead male role in Ice Castles, and later was the voice of “the Beast” in Disney’s Beauty & The Beast. But he’s no Chester Marcol. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KA2fHoUkG2g Udder stuff - commentary from the Badger Underground Last Saturday, Bucky took apart the hapless Scarlet Knights of Rutgers 48-10 whose only claims to fame is having played in the original college football game and having Ray "punch her in the face" Rice on their team a few years ago. Around college football, there were more cool things going on with "The Play II" in Miami http://bit.ly/1MfzbgY and Temple screwing up their Cinderella story by almost beating Notre Dame who of course came out of it unscathed with a #5 ranking. Why TF do we not get rid of rankings and use the Badger Underground plan to decide playoff teams? I know, it is too logical. As for this weekend, it looks like the Badgers are falling into their stride as they travel to College Park to dismantle the Maryland Cirque du Soleil Clowns. MD does have an X-factor, Will unLikely. He will be fun to watch running back kicks, but hopefully won't catch Bucky snoozing. Unless he is the second coming of Devin Hester, I look for a replay of last Saturday’s result -- Bucky should wipe the floor with the glad rags out in MD, winning 35-10 and the loss to Iowa will loom bigger and bigger as a woulda shoulda coulda nightmare. Their QB can put up the rushing yards, but not the passing yards. Given Wisconsin’s outstanding LB group, I’m not concerned about him putting up a bunch of points on us. We are much more vulnerable to really good passers, but fortunately have none on our schedule. ILB Orr likely will not play, but WI does get Goldberg back. Maryland has an outstanding DE and very good pass rush. With WI’s OL issues, that would have been a real concern two weeks ago. With Clement back, defenses now have to respect our running game rather than simply teeing off on Stave and daring one of his 4.9 40 receivers to get behind the DBs. Loading the box runs the risk that he gets through the first wave of tacklers and breaks big runs. Being two dimensional should also make it easier for even our receivers to get open. In response to about a thousand emails wondering where the Badger Underground name came from, here is the history. No, it is not a sewer pro expert in Milwaukee. Back in 1986, three bored 20 something professionals living in the Fox Valley decided to take a little road trip. Where the hell is Neenah? To make it more interesting, they gave the quest a mission which was to entice the then Governor, Tony Earl, to sing on the David Letterman show. To accomplish this, they formed Badger Underground as a “non-violent terror” organization to change all those wooden signs saying “Wisconsin Welcomes You” to show the sitting governor as David Letterman. Starting at Kenosha and working in a clockwise fashion, the media picked up on the caper in LaCrosse. A “sleeper cell” in LaCrosse immediately claimed responsibility for the act and the story went viral in a 1986 sort of way, meaning it was on the AP wire service the next Monday. This led to a TV interview on the WBAY Green Bay News (with bags overhead - like the "Unknown Comic" from The Gong Show, and Arab sounding aliases of Omar, Abdul, and Melvin) and a challenge to Tony Earl who characteristically wimped out. It was still fun, though. We're gonna kick your a$$ - predictions for the next game The Carolina Panthers are undefeated, but their resume of victories is unimpressive. In fact, they stink. They smell – like a used diaper filled with Indian food. It’s time to break them Panthers into tiny bits and make musk out of them. They've done studies, you know: 60% of the time, it works every time. www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKiSPUc2Jck In reference to defenses slowing us down, McCarthy said “That would be a common approach toward our offense, to just get up and lock the receivers down and make them win. But there’s more to offensive football. We have a lot more to offer than drop back and run pass plays versus bump-and-run.” And this Coach agrees with that comment from coach MM. He is basically saying we’ve become too predictable…so what do we do? Let’s take a page out of coach Eminem’s playbook from 2007.
“Establishing a precedent amid the Green Bay Packers’ kind of history isn’t easy. It’s sort of like a quarterback just shy of his 38th birthday standing exposed for much of a game in an empty backfield, when a Super Bowl-level opponent just knows you’re going to pass, and throwing for 369 yards on the way to an NFL record.” ------ Mike Hunt, September 24, 2007, Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. “Brett Favre didn't need a rocket arm to become the winningest quarterback in NFL history on Sunday. His 17 years of football knowledge and a near-perfect second half against a bad defense were plenty. “ ----- ESPN, September 21st, 2007. “Brett Favre, quarterback, Packers: He did a lot more than establish the all-time NFL record for victories by a starting quarterback (149). Favre was the offensive catalyst for Green Bay, completing 29 of 38 passes to eight receivers for 286 yards, three touchdowns and a passer rating of 112.4” ----- Dick Pufall, Packer Plus, September 20th, 2007. To win Sunday, Coach says use a heavy dose of 5 wides, interspersed with full house backfields and 2 TE’s, will be completely out of character and will put a beat down on one of the best defenses in the league. On Defense we have done well this year when we crowd the box and put the cornerbacks in press-man coverage on the outside. Hey, Dom-Dom, let’s play aggressively like we were a few weeks ago. Let’s go single safety high, press man on the outside and get 8 in the box. Being doubly negative, it hasn't not worked for us yet this year. JB - Packer players you forgot about, but stories you'll remember about them You remember Jeff Query, don’t you? Back in the day, Jeff Query, a.k.a. “White Lightning” was the original Wes Welker -- before being a quick little guy was cool. Of course, in today’s NFL Jeff would not be allowed to play, having both a given name and a nickname that are blatant diversity fouls. Political correctness aside, he was a fan favorite. The same fans that just can’t get enough of Jeff Janis on the field today woulda loved watching Jeff Query play 25 years ago (wait… “Jeff” Janis, “Jeff” Query … both from tiny football college programs and the only Jeff’s to have ever played wide receiver for the Packers? … that’s freaky … just sayin). White Lightening was hard to cover because he was wicked fast, and hard to tackle because he was diminutive and quick. …the kinda guy Belichick keeps around after final roster cuts are made. Jeff’s flowing blond “business in front, party in the back” mullet hairdo was all the rage back then (that, and Metallica back patches on stone washed jean jackets). Query played during the “we almost made the playoffs” years of 1989-1991. He averaged about 14 yards per catch, 21 yards per kick return, and almost 10 yards per punt return. Not bad for a half-pint from tiny Millikin University in Decatur, Illinoise. His QB in GB? …None other than another fan favorite of the day donning a similar haircut, the almost legendary Majic Man, Don Majkowski. Query was a down-to-earth, Midwestern kid and a refreshing break from the receiver that started on the other side of the field, the self-absorbed and smug Sterling Sharpe – who constantly shunned the local media and later, ironically, turned to the media for employment when his football career was cut short by a freak accident that forced him to strap his chin to the back of his helmet. So, as we look forward to battling Carolina, and sorely miss having a receiver that can beat coverage, we pay tribute to a little engine that could: Jeff “White Lightening” Query … sa-lute!
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Author"Coach" is the insightful collective brain and funny bone of a few legendary Packer fans who provide everything you need to know (and what Packers beat writers often plagiarize) about the Green & Gold, plus a weekly guest appearance by The Badger Underground. Archives
November 2022
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