Welcome back to The Coach Clarahanson Show!!! In Coach’s Humble Opinion: NFL should get rid of its ugly ties “Chelsea battles Arsenal to a nil-nil draw!” That headline might be exciting for wine-sipping effeminate Eurotrash and Ale guzzling UK hooligans, but keep that shit out of America. Nothing is worse in NFL competition than a tie. Both teams come away feeling like they lost, so why not treat it like a loss. That’s right, I said it: a game that ends in a tie should be treated as a loss for both teams! Currently, both teams get the ball at the end of regulation unless the team winning the 2nd coin toss scores a touchdown. Seriously, that is the rule. Oh, and there is only 10 minutes in the final period. What a crock. Also, there’s player safety issues with extending games and all that. Come to think of it, let’s get rid of overtime, too. Crazy ideas? Well, let’s think about this for 11 seconds… When time is dwindling down, if you knew you were probably going to “lose” because you have the same number of points as the other team, you actually have nothing to lose if you recklessly go for the win. Teams would frantically try to score points as time expires. That would be awesome, and coaches wouldn’t have to worry about the public scrutiny of losing after throwing caution to the wind because they would have been charged with a loss regardless. In all reality, head coaches would probably start getting pretty aggressive by the midpoint in the 4th quarter. Of course, overtime would still be necessary in the playoffs, but… baby steps… we’ll improve that later. So, NFL, get rid of the current overtime rule debacle for regular season play, and increase the scoring in the League without adding more stupid and controversial, subjective penalties that are difficult for refs to interpret. Ties-equal-losses would be much better than the current, complacent limping into overtime that NFL teams exhibit today, and would be very easy to implement in year 101. Besides, its no fun kissing your sister... at least, in my humble opinion. Create A Seam Here – X’s & O’s about the game or a scheme Awright! OK, so it was an ugly game and the Defense had to ride to the rescue again, but the Packers are 3-0 and are now 6-0-1 (all-time) against the Broncos in Lambeau. AND More important to you, of course, is how did Coach do in predicting the game? Not to fear, Coach almost perfectly predicted the outcome! If not for the Broncos kicker doinking an extra point on the North End Zone upright, and Mason Crosby missing wide right on the same goal, Coach would have been within 1 point again this week. Just sayin’. Three games into 2019 and what can we conclude (aside from the Offense should have been playing together all Pre-Season)? JK Scott is really good and getting a lot of work. Thank goodness he is killing it; he’s averaging 43.7 net yards per punt. A really, really scary stat is that we are No. 2 in total punt yards/game, just behind the Jets. More important than his net average is that he is making clutch punts that he didn’t last year. Much like in the Bears game, Scott had a booming punt when needed. At 4:34 in the 3rd with the Offense stalled…again…at the Packers 32-yard line, JK nailed a 66 yarder to the Denver 2 (short return called back on illegal block). Denver hit a long pass on the run (thanks Mr. King), but eventually gave up an interception to Savage at the GB 28. A win for Scott, give Denver a shorter field and probably the King mistake would have been a TD. It’s no exaggeration to say that without Scott we lose this game (and likely the Vikings game as well). The Defense is Grrrrea….good. The Defense has been the highlight of all three games so far. We are No. 1 with 2.7 take-aways per game and No. 1 with a 2.0 turnover margin. The pass rush is fantastic and the Smith Brothers already have 2 ½ more sacks than the sad-sacks that they replaced. Our D-coordinator Poutine is focused on making the opponent stay on the field and eventually give up a turnover…much like Capers in-fact. It is working so far, and we are tied with Carolina with 4.0 sacks/gm. The “but” is that we are giving up an average of 4.9 yards/rush, which ties us with Cincinnati and Arizona for 24th in the league. When the focus is on confusing the O-line with the blitz, we are not assignment sure in the run gaps. We are also still paying the price for “thudding up” instead of tackling in training camp, we have way too many missed tackles. No better example than Denver’s 2nd TD. With 4th & Goal on the GB 1, at 5:59 in the 3rd, Philip Lindsay ran straight into Dean Lowry who went high and tried to take him down by the shoulders… It didn’t help that Raven Greene and Montravious Adams were out, either. The Offense? Is a puzzlement. The off-season story was that the Offense would be predicated on the run, which would set up play action passing. LaFleur, true to the philosophy, is running much more than his predecessor Melissa McCarthy. We rank in the Top 10 in rush play percentage and are No. 15 in rushing attempts per game. We would be in the Top 10 if we only ran more plays per game! Why aren’t we running more plays per game? The problem is that we rank 26th in yards per rush, paired with a nice 25th in yards per pass and we have the 28th position in yards per offensive play. The net result is we end up in long 3rd downs and we are not converting them. Is the new offensive scheme working? The positive view is that we have gained more yards and scored more points each of the first 3 games, so maybe it is and maybe we are inching our way there… …but Coach is not so sure the QB is buying in. Who knows what’s in AR’s head, but there was a sequence in the 3rd Quarter where AR’s play and body language was “see Coach, I’m trying it your way and it doesn’t work, let’s do it my way.” The whole series was a bust and disgusting. Penalty on 1st, and then on both 2nd and 3rd Rodgers threw the ball in the dirt. Easy to say he should have hung in there as Coach opines from his couch, but it sure looked like he quit on both plays. Clearly AR is frustrated…and as he walks back to the huddle after 2nd down it looks like LaFleur is talking to him thru the helmet speaker, and AR basically flips him off. Wow, I really hope I’m wrong. If I’m right, then LF needs to grow a pair and get all over Rodgers, again, like last game. But there is good news! Edgar Bennett is back! You may remember that Edgar was a “mudder” and was a star of the great teams of the 90’s. Unfortunately, the synthetic/grass mixed field is way too clean now and we don’t get true mud anymore, so we don’t get the great shots that we used to! Make no mistake, the track was plenty wet and slick on Sunday, and... Facing 1st & 10 at the GB 26 at 13:30 in the 4th Qtr, the score was 24-16 and it felt like maybe another 3 & out like the one above and we might only be a 2 pt conversion away from a tie game. Then Jamal Williams contributed 19 yards to a 51 yd drive that ate up 7:41 and resulted in a Mason Crosby 41 yard field goal to put the game away. Game ball to Jamaal. Coach really liked his successful ground and pound style in Q4 when we really needed it, even though we hadn’t been able to run on Denver all day!! WTF – Coach’s take on football news that’s messed up Dishonorable Mention WASHINGTON D.C.—Congratulations to London Fletcher, who was inducted into the Washington Redskins’ Ring of Honor during a ceremony on Monday night. Don’t remember much about him? Well, don’t feel bad… Apparently the Redskins didn’t either. The video board at FedEx Field actually had Fletcher’s last name misspelled as “Flecther” during the ceremony that honored him. That is just sad. Even the mentally bereft Bears spelled Butkus correctly when they honored him at halftime of a game against the Packers, in which the Bears were thoroughly pummeled by Brett Favre and company. Too bad, London, you deserved better. Six-Year-Old Saying, ‘Why Not Make NFL Tickets Free?’ Surges To Top Of Democratic Polls HOUSTON, TX—A new candidate has come out of nowhere to surge in the polls in the Democratic primary, and she’s only six years old. Cindy Carruthers of Dearborn, Michigan, was on a local news segment where children gave their opinions on world problems, and she remarked that her dad was really mad it cost two-week's take-home pay just for 2 tickets, parking, and beverages to go to a Lions game. Cindy asked, “Why can’t we just give everyone everything they want for free?” The message quickly went viral and really resonated with Democratic voters, propelling Cindy from unknown to third in most polls, ahead of Bernie Sanders and just behind Elizabeth Warren and Joe Biden. "She really has a plan for everything,” said Emily Estridge, one of Cindy’s enthusiastic supporters. “While Elizabeth Warren only has a plan for getting people free health care and free college, Cindy has a plan to get everyone free everything…including the all-American game of NFL football that everyone wants to see – regardless of their income. She’s truly a visionary.” Her new candidacy has upset some of the other candidates, with Bernie Sanders accusing Cindy of stealing all his ideas. Others say the math in her plans doesn’t add up, to which Cindy says she doesn’t like math and instead likes “Rainbow Dash.” In a show of solidarity, both the NFL owners and the Players Association have rebuked Cindy’s free-NFL-for-all platform as a radical pipe dream, claiming that bold government fiscal programs such as this are not sensible and should be limited to much simpler endeavors such as providing health care to our military veterans, and subsidizing solar panel companies to eliminate the need for oil. Even President Trump has taken notice, vowing to trounce Cindy in the general election since Trump himself can “already read and write at the level of an eight-year-old.” There are also concerns Cindy may be gaffe-prone like Joe Biden, as one day at school Cindy referred to her teacher as "Mommy" by mistake, prompting a round of laughter from her classmates. Still, Cindy has unveiled her new popular campaign slogan, “But I want it!” and has already qualified for the next Democratic presidential debate, though she may not be able to attend since it will be on past her bedtime. The Bears Still Suck – Coach has proof Trubisky Makes Miraculous One-Handed Pass CHICAGO—Bears quarterback Mitchell Trubisky made a mind-boggling, gravity-defying one-handed pass against the Washington Redskins on Monday night, which arguably could change his life. It propelled him into unprecedented superstar status, but it also left him needing to prove he is more than just a guy who could throw a football using only one hand. "It's bittersweet because I think my career is much more than one pass," Trubisky said after the game. "But it was a very iconic moment and just a prolific moment in my career. I don't mind getting tagged on Instagram and seeing myself bunched in with some of the best passers of all time. It gives me motivation to do something even crazier." The pass came in the third quarter of his 29th career game. It led to a complete blowup on Twitter, and almost immediate text conversations with Michael Jordan and a new friendship with LeBron James that is really taking off. Trubisky's one-handed pass rocketed the 3rd year pro into the NFL stratosphere. It also put him under a microscope, even among players around the NFL. After the game in which he flung that pigskin with just a five-finger death grasp, opposing cornerback Josh Norman publicly stated a perception that Trubisky is desperately trying to disprove… "His world is based on hype and that one pass," Norman said. "Everybody sees that, everybody knows him for that, and people don't really look at the film and watch him, and really don't know how crappy of a player he is. Mitchell Trubisky is just a guy version of Jay Cutler." Trubisky subsequently stated, “You hear the talks. It's funny when people are like, 'He's only this one-hand pass guy, blah, blah.' I don’t let that bother me. It’s a moment that changed my life forever, for better or for worse, and I’ll never forget it. I’ll remember it all … the smell of the stadium, the dew on the grass." Now just about every move Trubisky makes will be scrutinized. But, as dozens of his Bears quarterbacking predecessors can relate to, Mitchell (or “Mitch Dog 1” as he prefers to be called) still lacks playoff success. He has appeared in just one career playoff game, and that didn't go so well (despite having a defense loaded with ProBowl’ers), leading to a home loss to the visiting Philadelphia Eagles. And, aside from his ability to throw a pass one-handed, other than that he pretty much sucks and remains ranked near the bottom of all NFL QB’s. Udder Stuff – Commentary from the Badger Underground Bursting Into The Top Ten – Badgers Take On Northwestern “Michigan expects to beat Wisconsin every year.” – Charles Woodson, FS1 pregame show trash talk. “We are going to make a statement.” – Michigan QB Shea Patterson, on the trip to Madison. Michigan was in town for the first stop on the Badgers 2019 No Mercy Revenge tour. Recall that BU foreshadowed that the mere threat of a passing game would yield run game dividends, but underestimated the impact of a QB with average foot speed and wrongly assumed that highly respected long-time UM defensive coordinator and Captain Kangaroo look-alike Don Brown would have an answer. Michigan was actually looking forward to this matchup as it marked the first time this season that they would be playing their familiar base defense against Wisconsin’s traditional Mr. Greenjeans offense. Here is what Brown had to say during the bye week as the Wolverines were preparing for Wisconsin. “This is a little different deal now,” said Brown. “We finally can play Michigan defense, where we can go back and run our stuff that we run all preseason and all spring practice. And, quite frankly, I’ve been writing Wisconsin cards, and I’ve kinda been, ‘Woohoowoo!’ because I can whip them out like that! (snaps fingers) because it’s all the stuff our guys know and are comfortable with. And we’ll jump into it at a high level, without question.” ...and then the Badgers trounced his D scoring 5 touchdowns ... 4 in the 1st half. Perhaps an offseason of reflection and the realization that he was paralleling the offensive stodginess and slow demise of Mike McCarthy crept into the psyche of Paul Chryst. We had to wait for the postgame press conference to confirm that Paul Chryst was in fact the one making the calls to go for it (and succeeding!) three times on fourth down, including a perfectly executed pass over the Michigan defender to Cephus as he was going out of bounds. One report from a recruit in the locker room before the game quoted this nugget from Chryst: “This is going to be the weakest (DL) front you play the rest of the year. If you guys don’t man up and manhandle these guys, then you’re a disappointment.” All of that led to RB Jonathan Taylor running for over 200 yards in about half of a game's worth of playing time (was named the Big Ten's offensive player of the week!). Taylor is averaging a touchdown every 6.4 times he touches the ball, which is an absurd statistic. And Chryst is once again an offensive genius now that he can rely on a QB that can run and throw the ball downfield. With Saturday being designated red & white stripe day, alums were asked to wear red and students were instructed to wear white. The only real disappointment at Camp Randall that day came in the form of heavier rain holding off until after the game, which denied stadium-goers the largest wet t-shirt contest in UW history. Northwestern is in town for the second stop on the 2019 Revenge tour and Bucky is favored by 23 points. With significant player turnover from last year, Northwestern has looked no better than average in all phases of the game. Clemson transfer Hunter Johnson has taken over at quarterback. As a high school senior in 2017 Johnson was rated higher than Alabama’s Tua Tagovailoa, Georgia’s Jake Fromm and Miami’s Tate Martell. So far, he has completed 48.5% of his passes for an average of 4.5 yards, with one touchdown and four interceptions. Ideally we hang 70 points on Northwestern like we did in 2010. Still PO’d about getting cheated out of the game-winning Jazz Peavy TD catch on our home field on opening day of the 2015 gun deer season. And they took our spot in Indy last December. Time to return the B1G West to its natural order and remind them of their place in life. As long as Badger receivers take 15 steps in the end zone after securing the ball, they should be fine. We at BU would prefer no letdown from last Saturday, but will settle for a Badgers 35, Purple Nerds 13 victory. Like last year, perhaps riverboat gambler Paul Chryst will elect to kick a last minute field goal to cover the spread. We’re Gonna Kick Your @$$ – predictions for the upcoming game Lombardi was 10-1 in the playoffs….and the “1” was a 17-13 loss to the Philadelphia Eagles in 1960. The Packers and the Eagles were coming off of a decade of mediocrity and this was the Lombardi Packers’ first trip to the post season. Paul Hornung said later: “I’ve always remembered Vince’s speech, he told us, ‘We’ll never lose another championship.’ And we didn’t.” There are many memorable moments from that game, and some argue it was the true beginning of the modern televised pro-football era. According to David Maraniss’s book “When Pride Still Mattered,” Lombardi later regretted not attempting two additional easy field goals, saying: “When you get down there, come out with something. I lost the game, not my players.” (An echo that would chide McCarthy in the 2014 NFC Championship game, although he f’d up that game in numerous other creative ways, too.) In the 4th Quarter the Pack went ahead 13-10, followed by the Eagles scoring to go ahead 17-13. With 1:20 remaining, Green Bay began its final drive. The Packers reached the Eagles’ 22, out of timeouts. On the game’s final play, Starr swung a pass to Taylor, who bulldozed past two defenders to the 8 before Bednarik and safety Bobby Jackson tag-teamed him to the ground. Taylor tried to get to his feet, but Bednarik sat on him until time expired. “You can get up now, Jim, this fucking game is over.” Bednarik thrust his hand into the air in celebration… “I wanted to kill him,” Jerry Kramer said, and went on further laughing, “I still call him Cement Head Charlie.” So, we still hate Philadelphia? Well, kinda, we hate them for 4th & 26 in the 2003 NFC Championship game, but frankly that was mostly our fault for letting Ed Donatel run the Defense. We lead the all-time series 27-16-0 and we are 6-1 over the last seven games, dating back to 2007. It’s hard to really hate a team that we’ve been dominating by an average score of 26-18. Particularly when good ‘ole boy Doug Pederson is the Coach. You might remember Doug, as he was a prominent bow hunter around these parts back in 2003. He dropped this nice 8-pointer on the McCoy’s farm just off Highway B near Cataract in Monroe County. He also brought along a couple of his buddies from work for the hunt, some dude named Wesley Walls and another guy called Brett Favre. Favre mentioned to the senior McCoy he likes the hills in the area. "I told him they get steeper every year," McCoy said. "He told me the football field gets bigger every year, too." Nice story. Anyways… OK…onto this week, the Iggles are 1-2, but don’t be fooled by that record. They are an above average team and Wentz is leading the best Offense we have seen so far in 2019. They lost 27-24 to Detroit last week, but they fumbled twice, dropped a couple of trouchdown passes, and gave up a kickoff return for a TD while controlling the ball for 32:18. That loss only proved that age-old NFL adage of any-given-Sunday. With only three games played this Season you have to read any stat with a grain of salt, but to-date we are:
Sorry Douggie, ole pal, the Packers Offense will continue inching toward respectability and our Defense will continue to shine. Pack 27 Iggles 20 Chevon McNuggets - G.O.A.T. facts to chew on JB – Packers you forgot about, but stories you’ll remember about them Many a Packers-fan has been pleasantly surprised by the innate abilities of rookie defensive back Darnell Savage. It’s too early at this point to know if he’ll turn into a dominant player, but that begs the question – who was the best Packers defensive back of all time? To be honest, there have been so many great ones, it’s impossible to pick. However, if the question was more specific to “Who was the most dominant Packers d-back with only one eyeball?” then the answer would be none other than Bobby Dillon. At 10-years old, little Bobby Dillon lost the use of his left eye in a series of unfortunate accidents while playing in his home town of Temple, Texas. That didn’t stop him from playing football, though. He played college ball for the Longhorns where he earned the nickname "Big Dil" and went on to the NFL when the Packers made him the 28th pick in the 1952 draft. Dillon played in Green Bay for 8 years, leading the team in picks for 7 of them, recording 9 interceptions in 3 of those years, and had 4 INT’s in 1 game against the Lions (still an NFL record), with a career total of 52. No current player is even close. He was inducted into the Packers Hall of Fame in 1974, but has been unjustly overlooked for the HOF in Canton. Watch for Hall of Famer Ron Wolf to be pining strongly to get Dillon on that ballot. Bobby Dillon passed away earlier this year at the ripe old age of 89. You’ll be heartened to know that he lived a full life following his NFL career. He became president and CEO of WilsonArt International, and raised his only son, Bob Jr., who recently launched a successful whiskey company, albeit riding on the coattails of his father’s famous name. So, Bobby Dillon, we posthumously salute you with the words from the Baltimore Colts’ favorite target of Johnny Unitas and Pro Football Hall of Famer, Raymond Berry: “Bobby Dillon was one of the most superior athletes you’ll ever find in the NFL. He had tremendous speed. Great brains. Great range. Great instinct.” In other words, the Packers Big Dil was a dominating one-eyed monster. …maybe that could have been stated a little better?
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Author"Coach" is the insightful collective brain and funny bone of a few legendary Packer fans who provide everything you need to know (and what Packers beat writers often plagiarize) about the Green & Gold, plus a weekly guest appearance by The Badger Underground. Archives
November 2022
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